PHILDELPHIA MURDERERS AND NEW JERSEY GROUNDHOGS

July 24, 2007 Blog

More people are murdered in Philadelphia than any other US city, 352 so far this year. The City of Brotherly Love seems to have a problem.

There is no need to forma a special study group. Just listen to the citizens of Philadelphia! Those closest to the scene are often best informed.

Citizens are speaking out loudly, but yesterday, Mayor Street complained that citizens are not coming forth to witness against perpetrators of violent crimes. He says that he is determined to force citizens to come out and tell what they know. They obviously know more than they are telling, because you don't have to be afraid when you know nothing, and the people of Philadelphia are afraid. Very afraid!

The people of Philadelphia don't trust the police. Just like everyone else in the city, the police don't want to get shot, but some do. The message of the underworld is clear: "Don't meddle in our business! And if you are a cop, do your business elsewhere!"

The underworld obviously has the upper hand in Philadelphia.

Governor Rendell has a great idea. Pump more money into the city so it can hire more policemen. In Iraq, it's called a "surge," and it has a better chance of succeeding there than in Philadelphia.

Philadelphia Police Commissioner Sylvester Johnson claims that the city's murder problem is fundamentally a gun problem. Too many people have too many guns.

It is not just the criminals who have guns. Citizens, who don't have body guards surrounding them like the politicians and who don't trust the police to protect them, also buy guns. Commissioner Johnson sees a problem here.

I don't own a gun or I would be tempted to use it and illegally kill a groundhog that is destroying our garden and undermining the storage shed.

Somehow Philadelphia's helplessness in reducing the number of murders reminds me of the groundhog problem here in South Jersey. Both Philadelphia and South Jersey have problems with dark figures of the underworld. Although the citizens would like to eliminate these underground critters, they are protected by the powers that be.

Pennsylvanians love their two most famous groundhogs, but one of them comes out of its burrow only once a year and the other helps senior citizens every day.

New Jersey groundhogs steal food from the gardens of hungry senior citizens who are desperately attempting to raise a few edible plants to keep grocery bills down so they can pay their property taxes. The Garden State may soon become the Gardenless State and the highest taxed property in the nation threatens to collapse into millions of groundhog burrows.

New Jersey residents kill a few groundhogs that stray onto the road, but the ones in our gardens are protected.

Politicians, environmentalists and wild animal lovers who live in cities where there are none, are very concerned about the welfare of fat groundhogs. But they don't care about senior citizens.

I can't shoot them because I have neither a valid hunting license nor a gun, but that would be a waste of money. Even if I had both, I am not allowed to shoot them within sight of the house. Groundhogs know the law very well and stay close to home (theirs and mine are one and the same).

Nor can I shoot or poison them. And the law prohibits me from sticking a vacuum cleaner hose down its burrow and hooking the other end to my car's exhaust pipe. I should at least be allowed to bash a hole in its scull and suck its brains out. We are allowed to do that to unborn humans, but not to groundhogs.

I am not even permitted to trap them and set them free a few miles down the road. Like in the yard of some politician, environmentalist or wild animal lover.

So what is the problem?

It is the same problem we have everywhere else in America, but it is worse in Philadelphia and New Jersey. The problem lies in a bureaucratic and corrupt judicial system that penalizes hard-working, law-abiding, tax-paying citizens, but rewards and protects the bad guys. Even good police officers are tempted to become lousy ones. If they go after the big drug dealers, they become targets. There are plenty of little fish to pull in without endangering themselves and their families.

We all know what lawyers are for. They defend the rights of criminals and free-loaders. Candidates for jury duty are asked if they have moral convictions and if they do, they are disqualified. Judges seem obsessed with recognizing technical errors in court proceedings when money-laden criminals with top-notch lawyers are involved.

When most of us get ripped off by unethical business practices, scams and scoundrels, no one wants to hear about it. The police have more important business to attend to. There is not enough profit in it for a lawyer and even if you manage to get a hearing, it will either be appealed until it dies or settled out of court for a pittance that doesn't even cover your lawyer fees.

After a lot of surfing on the Internet, I think I have found a solution to the groundhog problem in New Jersey. I understand that if you pee in the burrow of a groundhog every two or three days, it will look for a new home. Just make sure the neighbors are not looking. That could land you in court.

Now it is up to the Philadelphians to see if that would work with criminals.

...with liberty and justice for all groundhogs and criminals.